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Parental Alienation




When relationships in the family are spoiled and spouses decide to get divorced, it is very important to avoid possible consequences of fear, hurt and anger. However, it is common situations when ex-spouses try to “punish” their spouses by hurting them or, what’s worse, their children. Cases, when former spouses use children as a weapon against each other, are quite usual, but still aren’t normal.

When one of the spouses disparage and criticize another one in front of the children (knowingly or without noticing it), it gives them negative emotions and feelings towards this parent, so they can limit their contact with him or her. The more these negative emotions grow, the more alienated second parent become to the children. As a result, child-parental family bonds may be broken forever.

On the one hand, it is a common behavior among many parents in time of divorce. On the other hand, making such disparaging notes and remarks while children may hear them is not healthy for them, especially in such emotionally difficult times. Such behavior is known as Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS). It occurs when of the parents try to alienate their children from another one, using rude comments, false remarks, or so-called “brain-washing”. If you are afraid you may be alienated from the children, call Sharova Law firm and let us help you.

The main danger of parental alienation is that there are no strict guidelines about how to treat such cases. At the same time, it affects much on the relationship with your children. To notice and establish the fact of PAS, the court may use not only legal counsels but also child psychologists and parenting couches. In case of proving the PAS, changes in custody and visitation are made.


The first sign of parental alienation is when you notice unreasonable dislike, or even hatred, from your child toward you. This may be a result of serious manipulation, which is considered as a form of mental child abuse.

If your former spouse is a reason for the child’s negative emotions about you, that damage your relationship, there is a way out. Top divorce and matrimonial law attorneys at Sharova Law Firm help parents in New York, Edison, and Newark to protect their child-parent bonds and prevent the risk of parental alienation.

At the Law Office of Yelena Sharova, the experienced team of seasoned New York family law attorneys is ready to keep your parental rights protected. We believe it is necessary to save normal relationship between parents, even in the case of divorce, so there is no place for parental alienation there. The importance of good, positive relationship among children and both their parents is obvious and undeniable. Using a child as a way of revenge is extremely serious, and to fight against that you need an effective legal representation.


One of the options to protect your child or children from a problematic parent is state intervention. It is done with the help of child protective proceedings – court proceedings which result in the government taking actions against the problematic parent. Another option is to hire a mediator – a third party which will facilitate an issue between spouses; yet court proceedings are not avoidable in both cases.

In fact, there are no rules and guidelines about PAS. Still, there are some obvious warning signs of such unpleasant situation:

• Destroying or hiding presents, letters, emails, messages and other signs of another parent;

• Showing another parent’s guilt in every unpleasant situation, even if he or she has nothing common with it;

• The child suddenly no more respect his parent without any significant reason;

• A child cannot tell which of parents tells truth and which one – lies;

• The child may also start to disrespect his psychologist or therapist;

• The child is afraid to show his love to the alienated parent;

• The child tries to avoid meetings with another parent without significant reasons;

• The child calls another (alienated) parent with hurtful names.

Visitation and custody issues are usually the most complicated ones during the divorce proceedings. Of course, some parents understand that it would be better for the child as well to deal with it quickly and without unnecessary conflicts. Unfortunately, in many cases, child custody matters play incredible roles in divorce proceedings (for example, because of such serious reasons as child abuse, drugs or alcohol abuse, or domestic violence).

Parents should always remember that the most important factor in such issues as visitation and child custody is the best interests of the child. Parental alienation rarely fits in this definition and simply shows the argument between the sides. Skilled and knowledgeable parental alienation attorneys at Sharova Law Firm will build a case (if necessary) against the alienating spouse to protect and restore the relationships between you and your children.

There are a lot of ways to deal with PAS. Some of them are based on simply negotiations, other lead to litigation on the court, so it’s better for you to be prepared to both options and get an attorney who will be able to aggressively represent you during trial proceedings if necessary. Some of the most common methods are:

• MEDIATION: Sometimes it is possible to negotiate the situation with another parent and mediate to the agreement without going to the court.

• CUSTODY EVALUATION: It is possible to reevaluate child custody by the neutral specialist, whose recommendations later will be used in the court.

• CUSTODY MODIFICATIONS: It means modification of visitation or custody plan, so one of the parents gets more time with children.

So, if you notice any of warning signs that you are losing your child, contact Law Office of Yelena Sharova. Our highly-professional parental alienation lawyers will provide necessary consultations and decide which strategy is the most applicable to your unique case. Have any questions? Call us now, or use our contact form below to get a legal advice from top NYC experts in divorce and family law.


The unfair methods to alienate the child from his parent are very destructive for both alienated parent and child and should be stopped at the very beginning. In the most difficult cases, legal actions should be taken against the alienating parent.

Whenever you feel you are losing your child because of parental alienation, make necessary steps as soon as possible to stop this abusive situation. Remember, the separation between parents, or even a divorce, should not be a reason to risk your child’s mental and emotional well-being. Top New York parental alienation attorneys at Sharova Law Firm won’t let anybody to ruin your bonds with the children and destroy your relationship.